How To Take A ME Day

Whether they are career moms, stay-at-home moms, or a work-from-home moms, one thing that I always hear fellow moms say is, "I never take time to do things for myself". 

Many of us get lost in living our lives to please others. We put our families first, and only take care of ourselves when all else is done. I am guilty of this, and I attribute some of my burning out to not taking the time to care for myself.

Today I was fortunate to have a free day off work. While I usually take my days off to run errands, clean the house, and spend some quality time with my kids, I decided that it was finally time to take this day to focus on ME.

For those of you who have yet to take a ME Day, here are some tips I've come up with to help you to enjoy this day to the fullest:

Step 1: Don't let yourself feel guilty. Drop your little ones off at daycare, or with friends or family, and don't feel bad about not using up your free day to spend time with them. They will have fun, and they will appreciate the revitalized mom that will return to pick them up at the end of the day.

Step 2: Do something that makes you feel good about yourself. I started my day with a Barre class, because it's a new hobby that makes me feel like I'm doing something good for myself - for my health, for my body, and for my self confidence.

Ready to say goodbye to my jiggly bits

Step 3: Go out for a meal by yourself. The thought of sitting alone in a restaurant has always intimidated me, especially since I've become accustomed to spending mealtimes cutting up meat, pouring drinks, wiping faces, and nagging for others to "take another bite". If you haven't dined alone before, I caution: you will love it, and you may want to do it again (and again... and again).

Dos Diablos and a caesar salad at Burgoo - if you live in or around Vancouver, you have to try this

Step 4: Take time to soak it in. It's easy to feel like rushing through the day, excited about all the things you want to do, but it's also important to sit back and soak it all in. I took a little stroll around Lonsdale Quay, and took a moment to enjoy this fabulous view of my beloved city:

Not the nicest summer day, but it wasn't raining so I'll take it

Step 5: Pamper yourself. With a full belly and a sore body, I headed to the spa for a 75-minute all-about-ME massage. I don't usually indulge in such a treat, but hey, I deserved it! You don't have to get a massage, but doing something that allows you to relax is definitely a MUST for a successful ME Day.

Enjoying some tea and snacks before my massage

Step 5: Treat yourself. While I really wanted to go shopping and splurge on some new shoes, I was feeling weak-kneed and drowsy, so I settled for a little sweet treat.

My very first time at Pinkberry - and it won't be my last

My ME Day ended quickly, but I felt relaxed, rejuvenated and refreshed, ready for my busy evening with the family. I went from burned out, to pumped up, and it was totally worth it.

Home sweet home with my lovely kidlets

Have you had the chance to take a ME Day? What did you do?

Quotable Bits #25

“Love only grows by sharing. You can only have more for yourself by giving it away to others.” 
- Brian Tracy

They're still young, and therefore regularly consumed by the "Mine!" mentality. And while I sometimes struggle to teach them to live in a 'sharing house', that it's not alright to grab or covet their toys, I am also blessed with moments like this:

I'm sure they'll learn to share as they mature and discover the benefits that come with sharing, but for now, I'll do my best to teach them, and will soak in these moments when I can.

Now it's your turn, pick a favourite quote and come link up your quotable bits! The linky will be live all week.

10 Things I've Learned From My Father

1) "Don't take any wooden nickels" When I was in high school, he said this a lot. At the time I just rolled my eyes and thought he was crazy, but it makes sense now. Don't let anyone take advantage of you - don't let them convince you of something that is not as it seems.

2) Patience is a virtue. When he first came into my life, I was difficult - it was challenging to accept a new parental figure after having spent several years as the only person in my mom's life. He was patient with me. He didn't push me to bond with him, he just waited patiently, and when I finally came to him, he welcomed me with open arms.

3) You have to work for your freedom. He taught me how to drive, and when I was ready to sit behind the wheel without supervision, he didn't just give me the car whenever I pleased, he encouraged me to earn the privilege. If I wanted to borrow the car, I washed it or put in some gas before it was returned to him. This taught me to respect and appreciate the opportunities I was given in life.

4) The heart is capable of so much love. When he came into my life, he had two biological children of his own. It took awhile for me to let him in, but he has always loved me and treated me as one of  his own. Eventually, in my adult life, he made it official and formally adopted me. Since then, he has taken in several foster children, and has shown them just as much love as he has shown to us.

5) Do what you love. Like me, he has done many things in his professional life. He has always encouraged me to follow my heart, and has never passed judgement when I've decided to switch my educational focus in school, or later, to change my career paths.

6) Don't sweat the small stuff. He has always approached life with a level head. I have never seen him blow up in frustration, or stress out over the little things.

7) Lead by example. He has taught me how to find a balance between hard work and family time. Not through explanation, but by living it every day, and showing me how it's done.

8) Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There have been things that I haven't initially seen as beautiful - a painting or an old rundown house that he has just purchased. But he has always proven me wrong, explaining the beauty in the painting, or fixing up the house into the most perfect home for his family.

9) If at first you don't succeed, try try again. He has taught me to keep my head up if I don't succeed the first time. That it takes a few misses before you hit the target, and once you do, it'll be worth the wait.

10) What to look for in a husband. They say daughters will end up marrying their fathers, and I'm so fortunate to have found someone who encapsulates all of the same qualities and values as my father - who can provide the same lessons to our children that I was so blessed to learn.

My siblings and I with our wonderful father on Father's Day

Linking up with the lovely Listmaster, Stasha, for her Monday Listicles meme.


Come join me on Tuesdays for my weekly meme for quote lovers - Quotable Bits! Just pick a quote, add a picture or write a post about it, and link it up! Linky will be open all week.

Wannabe Barre Star

I realize now that it has been almost 6 years since the last time I took an organized fitness class. And lots of poutine lunches, 2 babies removed, and 6 years of wear-and-tear later - well, let's just say that I'm not quite working with the same machinery.

After a few inspiring epsisodes of So You Think You Can Dance, I decided that it was time to get my jiggly bits off the couch and into some sort of fitness routine. I had heard of barre fitness, and was intrigued by the idea of combining ballet barre moves with modern-day pilates fitness exercises. I signed myself up, took a deep breath, and went along for the ride.

Here are 10 things that I've learned from my very first barre class, that I thought I would pass on to aspiring newbies like myself:

1) Do NOT, for the LOVE, wear light grey tight ankle stretch pants to a class where you will be surrounded by mirrors. My butt looked like someone had packed so much popcorn into a garbage bag, that it had stretched, changing its colour from a deep black to a light grey. Not pretty. If you thought horizontal stripes were unflattering, try light grey spandex wrapped around your trouble spots.

2) When meeting your new instructor, don't start the conversation with, "well I was a ballet dancer for 14 years so I think I've got this." It's great that you've danced, but if it was 16 years ago, it doesn't count, and won't help your cause.

3) Initiate conversation with the other classmates. I didn't utter a word to anyone, feeling shy and insecure as the only newbie in the room. But as we were leaving, and I received a warm smile, I realized that maybe the other ladies were feeling a little shy and insecure too. If we're going to fight in the trenches with each other for an entire hour, I don't see anything wrong with a little bonding.

4) If it's your first class, and your first time taking an exercise class in as long as it had been for me, you will, at some point in the class, shake like you've been given 2 doses of epidural (and for those of you who haven't had one - that means a whole lotta shakin' goin' on).

5) It's not all plies and ronde-de-jambes my friends. My husband rolled his eyes and wished me well in my "stretch class" as I rushed out the door. Little did we both know, there were planks, pushups, crunches, and lunges tucked between those ballet stretches.

6) Use the mirrors to your advantage. Instead of twisting your face while studying all of your flaws, use the mirrors to copy the instructor and the experts in the class.

7) Don't wear a baggy t-shirt. You will sweat, and as much as the idea of a tight tank top paired with those aforementioned stretch pants sounds a bit too close to a unitard, it's completely necessary, and everyone else will be doing it too.

8) Don't cheat yourself. At first it was easy for me to lower my leg and lean into a stretch in the middle of an exercise, but what good does that do when I've paid to feel the burn?

9) Be confident. Everyone has been the newbie in the room who doesn't know what they're doing. No one was BORN a barre star. It takes practice.

10) It's torturous and relaxing, draining and invigorating, humbling and inspiring, and you'll leave wanting more.

I don't plan on today's class being my last. I've taken a swig of the Kool-Aid, and I want more. I'll be back, but perhaps next time, I'll be suited up in a different outfit.

Just say NO to the light grey popcorn poppers

Weekend Bits (Quotable Bits #24)

"What is without periods of rest will not endure."
- Ovid

Last week was challenging for me, both mentally and physically. Lots of changes at work, and 28 consecutive days without the help of my husband (who has been working back-to-back 12 hour shifts) has left me feeling emotionally drained and physically exhausted. What I needed to lift my spirits: some family time, and some R&R away from the city.

On Friday I came home to this:



How can you feel stressed out when welcomed by so much love?

We packed up the kids, and headed to the Sunshine Coast of BC to visit my mother-in-law and soak up the family love that had been missing from our busy schedules.



Sailing away from the city has never felt so good



While Gramma caught up on some quality time with the kidlets, I jumped at the opportunity to rest my mind with a little of this:





But with all the rest and relaxation that came with our little getaway, there was no shortage of excitement. On a family  walk, we came across a lovely group of deer who were grazing on a nearby empty lot.

They didn't seem to mind that we were watching them as they munched on grass, and eventually sat on its cool surface for a break from their everyday routine. Oh to be a deer on the grass...

On Sunday we spotted a mother duck and her 11 baby chicks trying to make their way down a side street. The mother looked lost, and with the approach of some belligerent black crows who kept dive-bombing her babies, she looked afraid and defenseless. We had to help.



Can you see her little ducklings tucked behind her for cover?

For over an hour, my husband and a friendly neighbour worked together to wrangle the flock. They eventually managed to herd the baby ducklings into a bin, but mama duck wouldn't have any of it. I placed a call to the local wildlife rescue centre who advised us to carry the ducklings to an area with lots of brush so they could find shelter on their journey back home. They said the mama duck would follow, and so she did.

We set them free and off they waddled in a perfect little line.

The time we were able to spend together as a family after so many consecutive days apart was much-needed and unfortunately short-lived, as Monday morning was just around the corner.



The whole Bee family



My quote for this week is a reminder to take the time to rest, even if those rested moments are few and far between. For without the proper rest, how will we manage to endure the craziness of our everyday lives?

Now it's your turn! Pick a quote and link up your quotable bit. The linky will be live all week.

Discussing Adoption With My 5 Year Old

My little girl has always been surrounded by a diverse group of children, so it's only natural that as she matures and becomes more inquisitive, she's going to ask questions.

The other day as we were driving home from daycare she asked me about adoption. “Mommy, what does it mean to be adopted?” she asked. I explained to her that sometimes people have babies, but aren’t able to take care of those babies when they’re born. I told her that there are many people in the world with lots of love in their hearts who want to have a baby, so they adopt those babies in need. They choose to become their mommies and daddies, and give them the love and support that they need – and they become a family.

“You mean like how you and daddy adopted Keyla?” she asked. Keyla is our dog. “Hmm kind of..” I said hesitantly. “Keyla did have a doggy mommy and daddy, and we did choose to bring her to our home and take care of her and love her as part our family.”

She thought about this for a moment, and I could see the wheels turning as she took it all in.

“My friend at daycare was adopted, and she has very dark skin and curly hair. And my other friend that I also know was adopted and she has brown skin and curly hair too. Does that mean that people who are dark with curls were always adopted mommy?”

I explained to her that people come in all different shapes, sizes, and colours, and that anyone, no matter what they look like, can be adopted. She seemed satisfied with this answer and moved onto a new train of thought…

“Mommy, why is it that people with longer legs are faster runners, but cheetahs can run faster than giraffes, and giraffes have longer legs?”

While I was glad that she had moved on to a lighter topic of conversation, it brought me to realize that we would one day have this conversation again. That I would have to tell her that I was adopted and that I didn’t come out of Nana’s belly. In my opinion it’s not important whether or not my parents gave birth to me, but it's part of who I am and I feel like it’s important to be honest with my children about where I came from and how my family came to be.

I will tell her one day, but not today. Today we will talk about the necks of giraffes and the speed of a cheetah.

Have you talked to your children about adoption? How did it go?

Dinner With A Dump Truck (Wordless Wednesday)

I like to think that I have a pretty cool job, but let's face it, daddy's job is way cooler in the eyes of my littles:

Linking up with:

Inspired By Bloom (Quotable Bits #23)

"(Life is) not about wood floors. No, life is about love and truly experiencing the beauty we are meant to know."

- Kelle Hampton, Bloom

Let me preface this post by saying that this will probably not be the last time I use a quote from Kelle Hampton's memoir for my quotable bit of the week. She is beyond inspiring - a mentor for bloggers and for moms who need to look at life from a "glass half full" perspective.

When I was on maternity leave with my second little one, I remember having lunch with a friend who insisted that I check out this blog she had been following. "You need to start with the birth story of Nella first, and make sure you have lots of Kleenex" she said. I was hesitant, but I took a look because she had spoken about it with so much enthusiasm. How could a blog post be so touching? I thought. I went home that night, read it, and cried my eyes out.

I've been following her blog ever since, and have been truly inspired by her beautiful photography, her funky fashion sense, and her enviable creativity. She's crafty, she's gorgeous, and she's always positive about the challenges she has faced.

I'm only a few chapters into the book, and I'm already tempted to grab a giant yellow highlighter. Her words are poetic, sticking to my mind like peanut butter sticks to the roof of your mouth.

In the quote above, Kelle is talking about how she remembers a time when things were simple, when she would stress and worry about little unimportant things like the unfinished jobs around the house. How wanting wood floors consumed her mind. And she couldn't be more right, life really isn't about the little things you need to do to your house, it is about the little things you don't want to miss - the beauty that is life, and love.

Is anyone else reading Kelle's memoir? What do you think so far?

If you have a favourite quote floating around in your mind - write a post about it, and come link up your quotable bits! It's a great way to meet new bloggers, and to get more page views. Tell a friend too - the more the merrier!

Weekend Bits

This weekend was the perfect combination of fun and bliss, all tied up in a little package and topped with a big red bow.

On Saturday, the kids and I headed out to Port Moody to check out a vintage fair at the Aroka Vintage Boutique, where one of my besties has just started working. The boutique is located in a beautiful heritage style home, with a picturesque backyard garden which was tranformed into an old-fashioned market.

My kids loved the vintage popcorn popper, complete with old school popcorn boxes...

And I fell in love with the most fabulous lemonade stand I've ever seen....

My boy enjoyed a little quality time on a vintage couch with one of his favourite girlfriends...

And I treated myself to a little vintage purchase which will make the perfect accessory for the upcoming Fabulous Vancouver Mom Bloggers event I'll be going to next week!

Saturday night the hubs and I dropped the kids off with their Nana and Papa, and dressed up all in white for a "white out" themed house party. We drank from a bucket full of rum punch, danced our butts off, and enjoyed the company of grown up friends until the wee hours of the night.

While the adult time was fun, I couldn't wait to see the faces of my littles again. Hubs had to head out to work bright and early on Sunday morning, and I picked up the kids and headed to one of our favourite weekend spots.

Each weekend I try to do something new with the kids (check), spend lots of time outdoors (check) and find a little time for myself too (double check). The sun will soon set, and then it'll be another manic Monday and a busy week. Until then, we'll drink every last drop of the weekend bliss while we can.

All photos taken using Instagram - to see more, follow me @bitsofbee!

What did you get up to this weekend?

Mommy Group

We were floating around in a pool - a sea of nervous pregosaurus' when we first met. I had joined the prenatal aqua class to meet new moms-to-be, and as an excuse to have regular visits with a friend who had coaxed me to join.

I remember one-by-one each classmate stopped showing up. Emails circulated with beautiful photos of the new lives they had brought into the world. A constant flow of congratulations, announcements, and birth stories flooded my inbox. Then one day I showed up for class, only to discover that I was the last one left from the original group. Ten days past my due date, I welcomed my baby girl into the world, and my story was added to the inboxes of the friends I had made in class.

The first few days as a new mommy were rewarding, but also a challenge. I didn't really know what I was doing, and I was the first of my close group of friends to become a mama. When I saw an invite in my inbox from one of my aqua friends, inviting me to join in on a visit at their place, I was ecstatic, but also a bit nervous. I had only known these ladies for a short time. Would they judge me if my baby spit up all over their carpet? Would I have to leave the room to nurse my newborn, or cover up awkwardly while they looked on with judging eyes?

I arrived at my friend's house to discover a warm and welcoming group of ladies, and I knew I was in the right place. Surrounded by newborn baby coos and tired new-mommy eyes, I settled in and so our mommy group was born.

At first we took turns rotating between houses each Wednesday. We shared snacks, nursed babies, traded tips and vented about the challenges we had discovered in the week that had previously passed. I don't know how I would have survived those first months without the comfort I had found in discovering that I was not alone on certain concerns, challenges and issues I was facing. They knew where I was coming from, and didn't judge me, but instead supported me when I expressed what I was feeling.

One day, about 10 months into our weekly gatherings, we realized that while we had shared many hours together, we hadn't learned much about each other as people. We had spent our time talking about our babies and our marriages, but we didn't know much about each other's backgrounds and personal interests. A girl's night out was planned, and our group was transformed from a mommy group, to a group of lifelong friends.

5 years later and we still meet regularly. We've been through heartaches, disappointments, miracles, adventures, and celebrations. Some have moved on, and others have moved away, but a core group of us are still going strong. We had started as a group of anxious mothers-to-be, and are now forever bonded through our shared experiences.



 Each of us are so different as people, but our shared experiences have united us through an unbreakable and everlasting bond. I don't know how I would have survived these last 5 years without my mommy group, and I hope that every mother is blessed with a support system of friends like the one I have been so lucky to have.

"Family is a group experience of love and support"
- Marianne Williamson

Life Is A Battlefield

My mom always says to 'pick your battles'. Especially in a marriage, and with your kids.

At first I didn't take her advice. I got riled up by every high-pitched scream, every spilled drink, and every unfinished bite of dinner.

But I'm starting to realize that the more battles I pick, the less I win. My mad mommy voice was becoming funny, and my kids were not taking me seriously.

Tonight, I caught my 5 year old girl piling a life-sized stuffed tiger onto the head of her little brother. He screamed and begged her to stop, and she laughed and kept bopping him on the head.

I spoke to her in a firm voice and put her on a time out.

When some time had elapsed, I called her to me and asked why she had been put on a time out.

"There's no way it hurt him MOM. It's made entirely out of FLUFF!" she snapped.

She may have been right, but that doesn't mean her actions were right.

By the sound of her sass, I had picked the right battle.

My kids may have run around screaming, left food on their dinner plates, and splashed bath water all over the entire bathroom floor tonight, but I have to deal with the challenges one battle at a time, and I've already picked my battle for today.

Linking up for Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop. The prompt: write about an argument you've recently had in 15 lines or less.

Tiny Dancer (Quotable Bits #22)

"Dancing is the loftiest, the most moving, the most beautiful of the arts, because it is not mere translation or abstraction from life; it is life itself."

~Havelock Ellis

I am moved by so many art forms. Music ignites and accents my feelings. Photography elicits sentimental memories and emotions, and brings out my creative side. But dance - dance brings tears to my eyes and takes my breath away.

Growing up, dancing was my obsession. Most of my free time was filled with pliés, rond de jambes and sautés. I danced every day, with dreams of becoming a prima ballerina.

I grew older and my interests changed, but for 12 years, dance was my life.

My girl at 5

Me at 5

Now my girl is 5, and her love for dance mimics my own.

Last night, she played a dolphin in her dance school's production of The Little Mermaid. Her eyes were wide and her grin went from ear-to-ear as she pranced across the stage. Once she finished her piece, I rushed to get her dressed, and snuck her into the audience with me to watch the rest of the show.

She watched in awe as the dancers performed Irish, hip hop, jazz, and lyrical pieces with precision and enthusiasm. It was late, but my girl didn't waver, her eyes glued to the stage. "I want to dance like those girls one day mama." she said, in a trance.

"With lots of practice and hard work sweetheart, you can do anything" I replied.

She might not love dance forever, her interested will most likely change as she matures and discovers new things. But today she is a dancer, and I'm a proud mama.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now it's your turn! Pick a quote, write a post or add a photo, and link up your quotable bit! Don't forget to read the other posts, and tell your friends - the more the merrier!